c4liforniacation:

cock:

tumblr is basically a gay bar in a mental institute

who did you have to kill to get that URL

unnameablethings:

tricktster:

a good thing about having friends with kids is that you can just sow the seeds for something that you’ll never need to address again. like tonight my friend’s three year old saw me eating blue corn chips.

kid: what are you eating from that basket?

me: triangles.

kid: can i have triangles?

me: dunno, did you brush teeth yet?

kid: no

me: mhm, and are you okay with screaming really loud?

kidd: what???

me: yeah, sometimes these make you scream really loud, are you ok with that?

kid: i am not afraid of screaming.

me: you’re very brave. you can have two triangles. then why don’t you go show your dad your new power, i gotta go.

op u live up to ur username

pro-gay:

adumbrant:

pro-gay:

Hm. I must say, I was very anti-sport before but after being on tumblr.com for a while I definitely identify with jocks. Unlike nerds, they’ve never made me read sherlock mpreg miscarriage on the Harry Potter train AU Masterposts. They only wanna kick their balls and take booty pics. I’m sorry i took u for granted, jocks

The jocks were only trying to protect us all this time

They pushed nerds into lockers when no one else did

hellsite-yano:

hellsite-yano:

grimesapologist:

fuck it

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wyd after smoking this

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alyjack80:

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Charlie would like to announce his agenda for the year, which includes many naps and destroying as many toys as possible.

r1ces:

rikodeine:

r1ces:

we as a society should go back to playing neko atsume

My 9 year old has been playing it for years n she’s having a great time

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this is the only addition allowed on this post

A message from fishyandclintbarton


MINNIE, I'M

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angrythingstarlight:

sweater-daddiesdumbdork:

musette22:

GODDAMMIT, I-

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He really does 😭😭😭

😂😂😂

@lookiamtrying​ come get your man

iconuk01:

fuck-hatchetfield-high:

stars-bean:

Matilda (1996) dir. Danny DeVito

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As others have noted in the past, Danny DeVito not only directed Matilda (and played her dad), but he and Rhea Perlman (DeVito’s wife at the time and Matilda’s mum in the movie) basically looked after Mara Wilson because Mara’s mother was in hospital with terminal cancer at the time of filming (She died during post production work, and it wasn’t until years later Mara discovered that Danny had taken an advanced (not quite completed) copy of “Matilda” to the hospital so that her mum could watch it before she passed.)

When Mara mentioned that she was feeling nervous about the dancing to “Little Bitty Pretty One” sequence, it was DeVito’s idea to have the ENTIRE cast and crew join in and dance too (off camera) so she wouldn’t feel self-conscious, apaprently even the craft services folks joined in, and the cameraman shooting the scene did a bit of a shuffle, but not too much because it would mess with the camera shot)